On the latest episode of the Black Therapist Podcast we discuss the
Need for cultural competence at the internship level and why it is necessary for schools to address issues of bias and culture BEFORE, allowing clinical students to enter into field work.
Finding happy seven steps to relationships that will not steal your joy is the new book by me Nikita Banks, a licensed psychotherapist and life strategist, leverage the knowledge and you’ll receive in this book to help you with the process of obtaining absolute clarity. Through the use of Guided Self exploration. This process is necessary to help you master all your relationships in 2019 and beyond going amazon.com or black therapists podcast calm and grab your copy of the book guaranteed to help you redesign all your relationships based on two basic principle, health and happiness. Get your copy today. Welcome to the black therapist podcast. The black therapist podcast is podcast where we discuss the unique issues people of color face when dealing with mental health issues and mental health diagnosis. Now if you are new to our show, I am your host author a life strategist. psychotherapist Nikita Banks in private practice in my hometown of Brooklyn, New York. I am available for adult psychotherapy and coaching sessions. And you can find more information about that on my website Nikita Banks calm you can listen to our podcast everywhere podcasts are found Apple podcast, Google Play YouTube, SoundCloud, pipper Stitcher, I Heart Radio and black therapists podcast com if you are a mental health advocate or a therapist and you want to buy our podcast merchandise, you can do so by visiting our site. And if you want access to our free mental health tips, free online trainings, discount is selected selective services and resources do so by joining our mailing list by texting get happy, all one word 266866 if you love the podcast, please like comment and share. We love to hear from you. And if you want to send me some feedback, guest suggestions or simply to say hey, you can contact us at our website, black therapists podcast.com Please be mindful that this episode and all the information that we provide here is just a resource and a tool to help get you started on your mental health journey. If you are feeling any mental health distress or you having any significant issues, please feel free to reach out to us so that we can find you a mental health provider in your area. Okay, let’s go.
Hey, guys. Oh my gosh, is
so great to be back. I hope you have missed me.
I have missed you.
There’s been a lot going on in my life in my business and you know, just regular, regular regular stuff. So I decided to learn.
Well, I recently went out for a new certification. So I took the gambling addiction specialist course. And that was a 60 hour course that thank God I pass the exam and I was able Let’s, uh, take some classes that I was supposed to take at Columbia. So just trying to advance my career. And it feels like education, education and more education is like, okay, I don’t want to go to get my DFW right now, going back to school to get my PhD is not something I want, but school never stops if you’re a clinician, you really want to stay up on your craft. And so, recently a lot of the challenges that I’ve had in the office have really been around working with my interns and like navigating that whole thing, and I thank God that I’ve had supervisors who allowed me the, the time to be able to tap into them, or reach reach back to tap into them as resources to help me through being a supervisor. So
was it last the last year, the year before I got my sippy. If you are licensed in New York as a clinician that you know, that Syfy is a certification and field.
instruction. I always forget what s is si si stands for. But basically what it is is a specialized training for people who want to have interns, but people who want to be supervisors. It really teaches you how to be the best supervisor. And, you know, it’s been really challenging for a number of reasons. And so, yeah, I was driving along and I recorded something while I was driving, I was paying attention guys don’t, don’t don’t get mad at me but I recorded my thoughts in the moment because I felt like it was something necessary for people to hear you students if you are out there and you are looking for internship, if you are first starting out on your social work journey, I implore you to, at least in the summer before you start to find yourself a really good therapist. If you are entering into a social work program or a counseling program, the LPC program, mental health program, whatever it is, find you a good therapist so that you could start pre processing some of the issues that you have before you start your client work because what ends up happening is and I hope once I edit in what I already pre recorded, it doesn’t sound redundant, but I can’t I don’t think I can ever say this enough. Once you start your field placement, it doesn’t oil, your practicum whatever they call it at your school. It doesn’t matter how much of a handle of yours on your stuff you think you have stuff is going to come up and unfortunately for us Lot of first year students if you’re entering into the field, no matter how long you’ve been a clinician, no matter how, you know much you feel like you are ready for the world and ready to be a therapist and have already tackled your traumas, working with clients will bring up all your stuff. And so, you know, this is a little piece of advice that I give you and then we will get into this week’s episode. Okay, so really excited about the things that I have coming up I’m actually excited about this weekend which is why the shows is pre recorded. It’s not like the shows ever live really anyway, but
you know, I’ve lost a lot of people in my life recently. had two other people pass away this week. Shout out to Blake.
Somebody summers will not be the same with Blake every year. We have like a like a Beach beach blanket Bingo. We go to the beach every year and just hang out we hang out all summer and so to the prospect of having to spend this summer without my friend is really something that I can’t even like process it happened this week and so you know if you guys are out there and you are morning your friends and your families or not even morning like let’s not even wait let’s not wait until your morning somebody but but please make sure that you are pouring into your friends and your family. I feel like God has been like really speaking to me since I lost my my art. I really just believed I had more time to spend with her.
I think that we all feel like we have more time to spend with the people that we love and
you never know how much time you have. So after you finish Listen to the rest of this podcast. You know, get up, get on the phone and call somebody that you love that’s been on your mind. Actually, I’m going to take my own advice. I’m going to call a friend of mine. I haven’t spoken to her since last year just because of a not even a stupid disagreement. Like we there’s no real reason why we haven’t really spoken outside of the fact that we haven’t reached out to each other, although I’ve kind of done a little bit more than she has, but what at least reach out this week because she’s been on my mind. And I really love her grandmother. And so I was like going through like Christmas videos and stuff like that. So I’ve been editing a really fun project lately that I can talk about when it’s finished. But I ran across a picture of her grandmother and it just made me like miss her more grandmother’s like 80 and
you know, I don’t want to
miss a lot more days with my friends. So I’m going to reach out to her. And then I’m super duper duper duper excited, because I am actually spending the weekend this weekend with my grandmother’s sister’s grandmother passed away when I was six. And so if you know my family that you know that I’m kind of not a I’m a grandma’s girl, but I’m a grandma’s Girl by like default because my mother’s father passed away when she was young. And so I’ve never had him you know, as a granddad because he wasn’t alive and then my father’s mother passed away when he was young. But I did have my my grandfather that really when I was younger, I don’t think that I kind of understood the concept of like he was a grand father. And I hadn’t you know, my step step grandparents Which there my name is banks and their name is banks. I don’t even think I even understood that they were like, not related to me and Mrs. Banks treated me like everything. So they really, really loved me and poured into me for the time that my, my mother and my stepfather were together. When I was younger. I don’t think I told this story before, but they dated when I was really young. And then, like, 20 years later, they ended up getting back together and got married. So So yeah, there’s that’s the thing. But my mother’s mother, she passed away when I was six, and my sister is kind of was kind of her favorite. But I have like really fond memories of times that I could make her do what I want her to do. And that was mostly like turn on my sister. Because I knew even though I was like, young, I remember just like, ooh, she’s your favorite. And I would like to tell her stuff that my sister did to me and I got I think I told this story before like now is like an adult I think my grandmother really just like pretended like she was beating my sister or like, you know, spanking my sister because I don’t remember there being any tears, but my sister also didn’t cry when you spanked her anyway, she’s mean like that. But yeah, I don’t remember there being any real tears. And I know as an adult, I don’t think my mother, my grandmother would hit my sister, but she would punish her as I’m doing air quotes that you can’t see. And so, you know, it made me excited when that would happen. But I’m going to see my grandmother’s sisters. And I haven’t seen one in at least six years, five or six years. I haven’t seen her mom, Gladys, and it’s her birthday. So I’m really excited about that. And my family’s like making a whole thing like, like, we’re gonna have You and I’m like, I’m really not a prize. I got probably not a gift she wants
bar birthday, but I don’t I don’t want to put it off. It was like God was nagging me nagging me nagging me to go
go and see them in my other Aunt Bertha. I haven’t seen her since I was like, it had to be at least 20 years and I haven’t been to my grandma, my grandmother’s birthplace, which is statesville, North Carolina. My grandfather lived there too, for my grandparents, his birthplace. I haven’t been back to statesville since I was nine years old. And so, you know, almost, you know, 30 years I haven’t been back. And so I’m really emotional about going and I’m really excited about getting to see them because Today, I also found out that yesterday, last nother aunt of mine and shout out to my aunt Christine. She and her sister and my mother’s way my mother were best friends to stop my blood on but if it wasn’t for her, my parents would not have met because they met at her house. And her, her daughter was my really best friend in life. And when she passed away, things had gotten a little tense between Christine and I, which I got, because I cannot imagine losing your child. But I can’t imagine what they are going through. Over there and you know, we cannot keep waiting until there’s a tragedy to come together. I’m so excited to be able to hug my arts and see them while they’re alive and go for a happy occasion it and not be anything else, but just like me being able to see them. And so if you have an elder in your life right now, please reach out. If you have a friend or family member that you haven’t spoken to in a while, if the beef was petty, and they distinguish your man or stole your monies to buy, let those things go because life is so precious, and really, really too short. And I just got my lashes done, so that I could go on this trip and now crying.
So yeah, we’re gonna get to the show right now and I hope you enjoy this episode and I promise you now that I have two more trainings that I need to do in order to get the big bucks. And so there’s those who trainings are finished, I promise you, I will be a lot more consistent with the shows. But you guys have to be patient with me to sell a little bit because there’s, there’s so much going on. And I’m trying to do everything and I am hiring, finally a virtual assistant. So that makes me really happy and I’ve been interviewing people to help me everything I do. I do myself, as you guys know, and so it’s been a whole hell of a lot to get all of this stuff done doing it alone, but I don’t have to do that anymore. So really excited about being able to bring
these more people on. And so yeah, here’s this week’s
episode. Okay, okay.
Keep in mind that I was recording this as I was driving around because I was tough to do, but I didn’t want another week to go by. Well, the show. I’m going to try to Edit the audio as best as I can to be clear, but I’m telling you, I’m dropping gems in this episode. If you are a social work student or a mental health student, you might want to hear it. So I’m going to try to edit it and make it as clear as I can forget the background noise. But you may hear you may hear some things while I’m doing that
black fanic no they
are either like all I got a bank
mandate as part of
but as a condition
is dedicated to
When the price goes up and
that initially if you show up
is how we, you know, not an opportunity
never ever had before, but never ever had a cover before.
cultural cultural compassion, that’s what has to happen
David at first you
know a lot of blacks definitely not working at all
situations where you are in a position of, you know
a person of color of color right
Dealing with a population of
a whole entire culture shock. So even I had issues with the schools about the work that I do. usually comes up in a coming up. Right? There’s usually
like hierarchy Hey turn the coalition. out yourself. You give them your You’re
now as a as a as an advisor
my clients out there, oh I need
question that comes up wait your evening
a sandwich between
the client and myself and
they also have is
more that you are able and eligible
as a way
for that thing
me to appreciate it, I really, I will say is best for a female Is that how is he not dry?
I train day in a church to
position the light.
Right and be honest.
You follow our HR
or find our
population that you have the comfortable working
as a clinician
as a client
And after this down I remember growing
up at that
meeting, I was called into this bike and
like I said, passion and
Haha, that was
that I told them I was like yo, I don’t want to work with
the state and the
state, actually something like oh okay
I don’t know if that’s a fact
or not Hi guys.
I want to represent the population by is the whole passionate about but has a condition now has worked Good for her
like that people
child molesters, sex offenders
Don’t you say what are you saying?
And I couldn’t get the job I was saying was, is that every single matter what,
no matter what I said election is no matter what
condition is should have an opportunity for
Facebook for the necessary skills that they need to thrive in life and all
opportunity that I’m going to tell you schools
population vulnerable population sure that they are going to introspective about you this works in a way that does not damage the idea of Goliath.
The first issue is here and that has to happen before they come.
Okay. Are you ready?
family members all right
experience to know that at that point that if you are a victim of Sharla at that point to know that we’re halfway or whatever
love you redefine.
what the hell did I get myself out of
it you know
I had to having a better Lola color and a position of power.
I thought about I shot that
I was just thinking about my Institute and installed in a situation with seven little bodies and not knowing what the ship I was doing.
around the impact of culture was tonight work and it has a culture of high it was just a combination of that with our
process of really choosing
paid for Start
all of these programs you talked about
a lot of our students coming in so fixated on the fact that they don’t know what they’re doing and that gives me new Jerry I know
that that that had radiation levels in the process of
life of your business partner on and in that case basis we could actually talk about it and okay serious if we are awesome
That was weird.
in her before that, I bet the tie
has to happen. You know, I don’t I treat my interest.
This is what I do every day everyone faces from a physical level as we all come into this work, bringing ourselves as professionals are
permission to be a commercial you could be, you could be quiet.
And we’re not all at the same.
We’re not all at the same customer development, you know, have the same awareness of common sense.
A lot of us have an old saying Proper
mind when you’re dealing with the worst case
that we brought to the show.
The level of realization that I don’t have
there was a girl who was
heritage she grew up
in California she was
she went by a name that was a father was a doctor and
she was in every single one of
So although I’m no copper is and I love
that I like
a password every single day
every single one of my staff is happy about that
challenge the future and like playing about what we’re looking for a job
is a job you ever faced as
You know usually equated to like
black and white stuff you gotta gotta whatever you
can about black you black versus white.
Like you about
other cultures and he was like that’s not bad like
everything off single time she was
like racial issues that hit or racial issues
come up. And
we will. She was just
rushing the conversation. It was a little bit
point that I was that
I find that
Hi. But I heard that
fact was that she was in every single podcast.
It was just
had it wasn’t
I wanna, I wanna mess up You know
he was talking about race
and you know she
visually was flat
and she finally said, well I dad is black and he never experienced racism and I’m talking about racism My father is a black man and he’s never ever
after your father your
father ever era
like value like ramen and this the California and after ever, ever his entire life seriously
how do you ever ever talk to me about it okay never talking to you about me and never experiencing racism
justice Do it go
and have a conversation with
like know. Like,
who appears to be
a parent, right?
Ugg Hello Tracy in her that I
don’t really honestly as a black woman as a black woman,
as a black woman,
I am like I told I, I feel that I as a woman, she
to use that and to say that
like it was. It was literally like anybody in the room who was a woman a person of color, who had experienced racism She she published really did that to diminish their as Jim and delightful now know how to discuss this right now knows how to act a fool. So when my professor saw what what the exchange was that when she came to me and we discussed it and I said Yo
usually after the lectures load off me but she’s in every single one of my classes. And she’s talking exhausting. And my professor says to me, Nikita, she’s limited. And I said, I don’t know what she’s talking about, about limited like, I don’t even think that’s the words the words that session you I think she used the word challenge. I think she said Nikita She challenged
I didn’t even hear what she was saying. I’m saying, No, no meaning get all that Could you switch my classes like I was at that point like, Yo, I need my I need a crash switch? And she was like, absolutely not. You are not to to class and she looked at me and she said, Nikita, we all come to this work with our own special and unique challenges. As you study and you’re going to go into this market, you’re going to enter this market, you’re going to be asked to be compassionate for your clients. How can you do that for your clients, or your coworkers?
And I was like, maybe,
lady, I don’t want to hear this
and to her right.
intended allow me to see someone else’s perspective. And it allowed me to acknowledge that I’m eligible and I’m able
to this work
Some days myself is my best self, my natural good, and I’m doing everything I can to be healthy and eat healthy. Maybe I got a good night’s sleep. Maybe I have no stressors, whether my bills all paid on tab, right?
I got love in my life and everything.
But I’m also eligible to full show up for other people. When I’m not at 100% some days I’m on faceting Some days I’m struggling with my own issues and challenges, and that I can still show up for people. And that was basically what I what I got from the lessons that she told me. She told me that this girl probably had all mental health challenges that she was dealing with the National field. And it was up to me to be compassionate enough
to meet her where she was.
So that when it is my turn as a condition, I can do the same, I think my feature for that lesson, but I really truly wish that that message, let’s talk universities and our programs, because more of us hear it, and we’re lucky to know it before we start the issue of a decline. Thank you guys for listening to another episode.
Black therapist podcast once again you can follow us on all our social media sites at Black therapists podcast on Instagram and on Twitter as well as black in therapy on Facebook or you can follow your host me Miss em s ni k i think on Instagram and Twitter as well as you can find out any information about me at Nikita and ik it a bank calm and on the show’s website laugh therapists podcast calm and don’t forget if you want to send us any general feedback show suggestions show topic for guest ideas please feel free to drop us an email at Black therapist podcast at gmail. com Thank you be well
Transcribed by https://otter.ai